With the holiday season now upon us, many people are already thinking about the things they’re hoping to accomplish in 2019. Whether you’re single, dating someone or in a serious relationship, the cusp of the New Year is the perfect time to check in with yourself, take stock of your love life and set intentions for the 12 months ahead.
“Relationship resolutions are great,” says Kailen Rosenberg, relationship expert and Celebrity Love Architect, “but none of them really matter unless you have true admiration and respect for one another’s life journey to begin with. … Celebrate where you have been and how the experiences in your relationship helped you both grow into the individuals and couple you are today — the good, the bad, and the not-so-gorgeous.”
Are you hoping to put yourself out there more? Build more confidence online? Keep things going with the person you’re dating? If you’re not sure where to start, here are a few dating resolutions to make in the New Year, according to Rosenberg.
- Appreciate the “now.”
There’s a saying, “comparison is the thief of joy.” If you’re hoping to be happier in your dating life in 2019, constantly obsessing about what’s lacking from your dating life isn’t going to get you there. Instead of focusing on the grass on the other side of the fence, live in the now and try to be appreciative of where you’re at relationship-wise. If you’re single, embrace the freedom that comes along with that. Get to know as many people as you want. Spend some time alone doing things you love. Whatever relationship stage you’re in, celebrate it!
- Honor milestones.
If you’re dating someone, Rosenberg encourages couples to celebrate the evolution of their relationship. Instead of looking back to how things used to be or longing for something in the future, find joy in the dating journey. “Notice how the two of you have grown and changed into who you’ve become today. Look at the ways each of your souls have impacted one another and woken each other up. Today, you are in a place where you both know each other and yourselves better than ever before, and that never would have happened for either of you without the other,” says Rosenberg.
Not dating anyone? No problem. Take stock of the things you’ve learned so far and how you’ve grown as a person. Write them down somewhere, so when you’re having a bad day you can refer back to them and be reminded of how far you’ve come.
- Don’t forget to actually date.
If you’re in a relationship, Rosenberg says it’s important that you still prioritize dating each other. Even if you’ve been together for a while, make sure you still plan date nights to keep the fire alive. As Rosenberg notes, “Next, it’s time for you to come together as two loving beings (‘grown-ups’) who have evolved to a new awareness. Believe it or not — yes — you can tap into the love you felt when you first met and start to date each other again.”
In other words, while staying home and watching Netflix together is great, making sure you still plan dates with each other to remind you of who you were when you first connected.
Not in a relationship? Plan solo date nights for yourself. Take yourself to that movie you really want to see. Treat yourself to an amazing dinner at that new, hot bistro. Do nice things to remind yourself that you’re worth it regardless of your relationship status.