As we welcome 2018, many of us are trying to find ways to improve our love lives — but let’s face it — simply jotting down “find love” on your list of New Year Resolutions is kind of vague and not very helpful.
Need something a little more concrete? Here are a few specific actions you can take to refresh your dating life in 2018.
1. Finally put an end to a ‘situationship’ that’s going nowhere.
That guy or girl that only seems to text super late at night or when they need something; that on-again-off-again relationship that never seems to say “on,” that f-boy or girl that never texts you after you’ve hooked up — now is the time to end all of these relationships. I know it’s somewhat comforting to know you have these people in your phone and their inconsistent attention can be flattering in the moment, but keeping them around takes up emotional space that could be used to find someone who actually treats you the way you want to be treated. It’s time to clean house!
2. Message people you’ve swiped right on.
It’s so easy and addicting to continually swipe right or left on people’s profiles without making a move (afterall, that little ding your phone makes when you get a match is all the reward you need, right?) Well, if you are actually looking to meet people and go on dates, all of this swiping with no messaging is literally a waste of your time. So, make a promise to yourself: if you’re going to swipe right on someone, you have to message them. No ifs, ands or buts.
3. Eliminate the dating apps that aren’t productive.
See above. If you’ve got a dozen different apps on your phone or you continually catch yourself swiping without actually meeting anyone, it’s time to delete those apps. You don’t need a profile on every single dating app in order to find a date. Focus on the one or two that actually work for you and go from there.
4. Ask him out.
Ladies, in case you haven’t heard: the future is female. If you’re not the kind of person who asks guys out on a regular basis, now is the time to change that. Go after what you want. If you’re interested in getting to know someone, let them know and invite them to go out. Any man that’s intimidated by a woman making the first move isn’t worth your time.
5. Resolve to switch up the way you meet people.
If you felt kind of “meh” about dating in 2017, it might be time to switch up how you’re meeting people. If you’re striking out meeting people IRL, maybe it’s time to give apps a try. If apps aren’t working for you, why not make a point of getting out more and meeting people through your social circle? Alternatively, 2018 could be the year that you try something totally different like hiring a matchmaker, a dating coach or asking your friends to set you up.
6. Break up with people like an adult.
Let’s make 2018 the year we leave ghosting behind us for good! If you’ve noticed a lot of your relationships or dating situations end with little to no communication or simply peter out, make it a point this year to create more firm endings and “close open loops.” Not only is it more considerate to the people you date and overall good karma, but you might notice you feel better in your dating life when you have official starts and ends to your relationships.
7. Get really clear on what you’re looking for and go after it unapologetically.
If 2018 is the year that you vow to meet someone to potentially start a family with, own the heck out of it and pursue that goal without apology. On the flipside, if you’re still not sure what you’re looking for from online dating, now is the perfect time to get clear on that. Whether it’s finding a life partner, going on as many dates as possible to figure out what your “type” is or simply hooking up with lots of attractive strangers, you’re going to find your dating life is a lot more satisfying when you have a clear goal in mind.