Browsing through dozens of pictures in your favorite dating site, you see a girl or a guy that you like. Now is the time to contact them, and you know what they say – first impressions are the most important! When you write a first message to an interesting person on a dating site, you want it to be written well, and you want the recipient to be impressed by it and answer you.

How do you do that?

OKcupid, a popular dating site, has analyzed over 500,000 first contact messages and came back with interesting conclusions.

First of all, you wanna avoid netspeak, too much weird slang and typos. People tend to ignore messages that are grammatically incorrect.

Another thing to avoid is physical compliments. Yes, for many people it feels weird that you give them compliments without even seeing them. More than that, a “You are so HOT baby” message is almost sure to be ignored by the ladies, because it feels like harassment. The word “sexy” is especially problematic – so save it for when you really meet the person!

When writing a first message on a dating site, you also want to be original and interesting. Don’t go around and copy-paste the same boring, generic message to all potential partners. Read their profile, find points of mutual interest and write about that.

First dates can be really unnerving. You are not only meeting a new person, but you probably want to make a great impression. Nowadays, a lot of first dates happen after an online chat in a dating site, so you DO have some information and impressions regarding the person that you are meeting. Still, online photos in a dating site aren’t enough, and making the first date a good one, is rather important.

Here are few tips for first dates – some are for men, some for women and some are for both.Remember: take it easy and have fun. After all, it’s just a date.

First Date Tips

1. Be confident (but not overly so):  Women tend to enjoy confidence in a man, while there are many men who won’t like a coy woman. So, be a part of planning the date – decide together where to go and what to do, and don’t be afraid to voice your opinion.
2. Keep it simple: You’ll be nervous enough without making a big show. Choose a familiar venue, or do something that’s easy and enjoyable.
3. Don’t go to the movies: The dark scenery of a movie theater can be very romantic, but it’s not an ideal setting for a first date, in which you want to talk and get to know each other. Movies are good for later dates.
4. Easy on the perfume: Girls and boys – don’t overdo the Eau de Cologne! You don’t want your date to faint, right?
5. Brush your teeth: Go for a mouthwash, too. Better safe than sorry!
6. Don’t give them the 3rd degree: Keep the conversation light and amusing! Avoid talking or asking about old boyfriends, girlfriends or any other Exes. This is a first date, not a criminal investigation.
7. Go for comfortable clothing: We are not suggesting that you wear dirty jeans and a torn t-shirt, but you should wear comfortable clothes. First dates are tense enough, you don’t need the extra pressure of a tight dress or too-new shoes.
8. Guys, pick up the tab; Girls, insist on going dutch: Someone will come out victorious at the end, but that’s the way it should be. Guys should suggest or insist on paying, girls should at least make a courteous move towards your purse.
9. Listen, don’t just talk: Yes, that goes for the both of you!
10. Turn your mobile phone off: Taking calls from your friends or reading texts is very rude and shows lack of interest. Only keep your phone switched on if you’re expecting a VERY important call.